the blechelor.

so.

i watched the finale of the bachelor last nite.
this is not something that i make a habit of. in fact, up until this season, i'm fairly certain i hadn't ever seen an entire episode. this season, based solely on the hotness of andy (the officer/gentleman/puppet), i've tuned in almost every week to watch the last 10 minutes of each episode. why? well. it's not particularly entertaining. moreso, it's fascinating. my complaint about the bachelor has been, and will continue to be this: have these women never seen an episode of this show? it's been on for, what, 9 seasons? do they NOT know that the whole point of the show is for the bachelor to date many, many women in the hopes of finding a (blech) mate? ok, wait. i'll back up. let's assume that they have not seen an episode of the show. so. we assume that they live under a rock. or in a hole. or have been kept locked away in a closet in some remote russian town. somehow, they crawl out from under the rock, climb up from the hole, or break out of said closet. the make it onto the show. are you telling me that no one (no one?!) says to them, "just so you know...there are 25 of you, duking it out or this guy." that must be the case, because WITHOUT FAIL, at least once an episode someone says, "i just don't understand...i thought he liked me. i thought we had a connection. i feel betrayed." cue tears and dejected walk to the limo-of-rejection. i swear to jesus.

annoying. and, frankly, depressing.

note: yes. i know it's only a television show. and no, i shouldn't watch if i'm going to get this worked up.

we came to the conclusion last nite that bachelor andy, in spite of his honest-to-goodness HOT factor, must have some major character flaw. he seemed a little vacant behind the eyes. and, also? he told two women, in the span of a day, that he loved them. on national television. and then had to recant to one of them. on national television. idiocy. (for real. that's just dumb.) also, his teeth were too perfect. they sort of screamed 'deranged dentist.' i mean, clearly he's not unintelligent (i think i read that he's a surgeon? i'm not kidding when i say i only watch the last 15 minutes.) but he's not the brightest bulb in the lamp of common sense.

funny: my mom commented that he didn't look like he was kissing with very much passion. quite possibly my favorite comment on anything. ever. she also hates the bachelor but was oddly riveted last nite.

[note: tv just told me that clooney, pitt and damon are going to be live from cannes on gma tomorrow morning. i think tv just exploded from glee.]

i always think i should feel bad for the girls on the bachelor. but, really? NO. you weren't forced into this (if you were, well. get yourself out of THAT situation.) you know exactly what you're getting yourself into. and yes: you think you're going to be the one. but, you have to know that the odds of that happening are not great. even if you live in a tiny town with very few men of note: stay there. your odds of finding a (blech) mate are greater.